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#068 How to compliment a women

Episode 68

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Read the Transcript

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Hi everyone! I am Georgiana, founder of SpeakEnglishPodcast.com. My mission is to help you speak English fluently.

In this episode, I'll teach you how to compliment a woman if you are a man. I'm sure this will be very helpful 🙂

SpeakEnglishPodcast.com/podcast >

And after that, you'll practice grammar with a Point of View story.

Complimenting a woman can make her feel special by showing her how wonderful you think she is. However, some guys don't know how to make good compliments. They either say the obvious or exaggerate compliments.

As a woman, I have received a good part of the compliments both requested and unrequested in my life. Some comments have been sweet, some shocking, and some even repulsive.

Before complimenting a woman, you must first determine if the context is appropriate.

Where is the conversation taking place? Are you at work, in a public place, or are you alone? It all depends on the physical context of the conversation.

What's your relationship with her? Are you strangers, friends, colleagues? If you are strangers, an unjustified compliment can be met with hostility, even if you don't say anything inappropriate.

No matter the context, however, one of the key things you must-do, if you want to be successful in complimenting a woman is to have at least one conversation with her, even if only for a few minutes.

You might consider complimenting a woman for something other than her appearance. Give her praise for her accomplishments, tell her she's funny, or that you loved the cookies she made the other day.

Show that you're making an effort to get to know her and that you're not just interested in what she looks like.

Let's see some of the compliments that women love and the ones you should never say to a woman.

For instance, never say to a woman, "You look well."

It's the worst thing you can say to a woman. She'll think you consider her fat.

The best way to compliment a woman is to mention her weight loss, saying that she looks thinner than normal.

Other women love it when someone comments on their gorgeous smile.

But if you concentrate on the way a woman smells, how lovely her hair is, or her beautiful eyes, you can also be misunderstood.

We like it when men say a dress or color really suits us, and we simply love to be told we look gorgeous.

What a mess! But the thing is that we are complex creatures, and men are mistaken to think they can't go wrong with a compliment.

Let's see some more good compliments:

"You look slim."

"You have a nice smile."

"That dress really suits you."

"That color really suits you."

"Love what you're wearing."

And I'll end this section with some very bad (terrible) compliments:

"You look tired."

"You look well."

"You've put some weight on."

"You look just like your dad/mum."

"You don't look as bad as I thought you would."

"You're not as stupid as you look."

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Speaking Practice

POV Story: Grammar in Context

Read the same story from different points of view and notice how grammar changes naturally.

01

First version

First Person · Past Tense

I was a beautiful and spectacular woman. My face was like the moon shining in its brightest expression, and my eyes were blue like the sea. Do you wanna know my secret? My beauty magically grew and grew with every compliment I received! Every day, from the time I got up until dawn, I only received compliments from everyone. I got so used to those words of admiration that I no longer appreciated them, and soon I'd be punished for it.

One day an evil witch bewitched me and made me look ugly. I became the ugliest woman in the world. What a tragedy! I was sad for a while. However, I soon remembered that my beauty grew with every compliment I received. So I wrote on a sign, "Compliment me". And I held the sign until someone praised me. Every day I received praises, and within a month, I was as beautiful as ever. What I learned from this experience is that I should always be grateful for the beautiful things others say to me.

02

Second version

Third Person · Past Tense

Bella was a beautiful and spectacular woman. Her face was like the moon shining in its brightest expression, and her eyes were blue like the sea. Do you wanna know her secret? Her beauty magically grew and grew with every compliment she received! Every day, from the time she got up until dawn, she only received compliments from everyone. She got so used to those words of admiration that she no longer appreciated them, and soon Bella would be punished for it.

One day an evil witch bewitched her and made her look ugly. She became the ugliest woman in the world. What a tragedy! She was sad for a while. However, she soon remembered that her beauty grew with every compliment she received. So, she wrote on a sign, "Compliment me". And she held the sign until someone praised her. Every day she received praises, and within a month, she was as beautiful as ever. What she learned from this experience is that she should always be grateful for the beautiful things others say to her.

Let's continue with the next and last section of this episode.

The Benefits of reading listening.

In this last part, I'll explain the benefits of reading and listening and the relationship between reading, writing, speaking, and listening.

As a language student, the main activities to learn a new language are: reading, writing, listening, and speaking. This is what we naturally do in our mother tongue.

One key aspect to keep in mind is that we can categorize these activities as input and output. As you may guess, listening and reading are input activities, and writing and speaking are output activities.

In other words, when you're listening or reading, you are being exposed to the language, and when you're writing and speaking, you are "producing" the language.

The traditional approach tells you that the more you write and speak, the better. That's why language schools insist on writing a lot and "practicing" your speaking with other students, sometimes in groups.

This seems reasonable, but it's not effective. There's a lot of research that points out the contrary: Basically, in order to develop your English, you need to do input activities most of the time.

Why is that? Because you can't produce the language if you haven't previously learned it, and the only way to learn it is through comprehensible input, as simple as that.

But then...is speaking and writing a waste of time? No, I didn't say that.

When you speak in a conversation, you can see what areas of the language you need to improve. Then, when you listen again, you will naturally pay more attention to those areas. For example, if you're in a conversation, and you have to describe something in the past tense. When you try to do it, you see that you make some mistakes. The next day, when you listen to your materials again, I bet you'll pay more attention to the past.

A good schedule may be listening for one hour a day (a course, a podcast, etc.) and practicing your speaking with a tutor or friend a couple of times a week. You will improve a lot.

Last but not least, there's an interesting consequence when you listen and when you read:

Listening will naturally help you with your speaking.

Reading will naturally help you with your writing.

So, if you are interested in developing your speaking, your fluency, you will need to listen a lot. Then you can practice with a friend or tutor. The same thing happens with reading and writing.

Thanks for listening, and I’ll see you in the next episode.

Review

Vocabulary from This Episode

Review the most useful words and expressions before listening again.

01 compliment

a polite expression of admiration or praise.

05 suit someone

look attractive or appropriate on a person.

02 praise

express approval or admiration.

06 gorgeous

extremely attractive or beautiful.

03 appearance

the way someone looks.

07 input

language received through reading or listening.

04 accomplishment

something achieved through effort or skill.

08 output

language produced through writing or speaking.

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Want more speaking practice? Continue with a complete audio course.

See the Courses →One payment · Downloadable lessons

4 Comments

  1. Francis.V.A.

    Very good to speak english

    Reply
  2. Francis.V.A.

    Lessons are good for speaking

    Reply
  3. Isi

    Excellent!👏👏👏👏👏…thanks a lot…

    Reply
  4. Kawthar

    I learned a lot from your episode
    Thanks Georgiana

    Reply

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